Just because your doctor prescribed it for you, does not necessarily make it safe for your dog.
Contrary to what you might believe, your dog is not a person.
Friday, October 16, 2015
Thursday, October 15, 2015
Don't listen to a word I say
Woman: She's been having trouble breathing and she can't sleep because when she lays her head down she can't breath. She doesn't want to go outside or anything.
Me: How long has this been going on?
Her: Three days. I kept waiting for her to, you know, pass away. But since she hasn't I probably ought to do something for her.
(Holy crap! Three days of laboring so hard to breathe that the poor dog can't sleep!)
Me: She's in pretty bad shape. Her gums are very pale (and a little blue). With her age (ancient) and her breed (super stub nosed boston terrier) I'm very worried there's something going on that we won't be able to fix. I think you should consider euthanasia so she does't have to suffer anymore.
Her (gets right in the poor dog's face and baby talks): She's not ready to go yet.
(Yes she is. She's halfway there already)
Me: Then I need to take an x-ray of her chest to see what the problem is and decide the best way to treat it.
Her: She's allergic to steroids
Me: Okay. I'm suspecting that her heart may be the problem and that's not treated with steroids. But we need to take x-rays to find out for sure.
Her: You can't sedate her. The other vet and I agreed that she can't be sedated.
Me: She just has to lay on her side for the x-ray.
Her: She'll get too stressed by that. She's already stressed by the car ride. I thought she might die. The other vet said she can't be sedated.
Me: I don't plan on sedating her for the x-ray. She just has to lay on her side long enough for me to click the button.
She looks at me suspiciously
Me: Or we can try Lasix to pull fluid from her chest. But I don't know for sure if there is fluid without an x-ray.
Her: I guess she needs an x-ray.
*OMG! Listen to what I'm saying! Don't bring in your seriously ill dog and throw out every random road block on why things can't be done! Especially when I already strongly hinted that your dog is suffering and you decline euthanasia. If you won't end their suffering, I WILL require diagnostics in order to treat them to the best of my abilities.*
Sadly, even after an x-ray confirming a poor prognosis, the owner insisted on trying treatment for the little dog's heart failure because She'll hate herself if she doesn't try. No, your dog (and I) will hate you for prolonging your poor pet's suffering. Can you imagine struggling for every breath, feeling like you're drowning the entire time? And you already let this go on for THREE DAYS!
In this profession, we are blessed that we have the option to end suffering when there is nothing more to be done to prolong a decent quality of life. I hate it when people refuse for selfish reasons. When you take on a pet, you have to see to THEIR needs, not your own.
Me: How long has this been going on?
Her: Three days. I kept waiting for her to, you know, pass away. But since she hasn't I probably ought to do something for her.
(Holy crap! Three days of laboring so hard to breathe that the poor dog can't sleep!)
Me: She's in pretty bad shape. Her gums are very pale (and a little blue). With her age (ancient) and her breed (super stub nosed boston terrier) I'm very worried there's something going on that we won't be able to fix. I think you should consider euthanasia so she does't have to suffer anymore.
Her (gets right in the poor dog's face and baby talks): She's not ready to go yet.
(Yes she is. She's halfway there already)
Me: Then I need to take an x-ray of her chest to see what the problem is and decide the best way to treat it.
Her: She's allergic to steroids
Me: Okay. I'm suspecting that her heart may be the problem and that's not treated with steroids. But we need to take x-rays to find out for sure.
Her: You can't sedate her. The other vet and I agreed that she can't be sedated.
Me: She just has to lay on her side for the x-ray.
Her: She'll get too stressed by that. She's already stressed by the car ride. I thought she might die. The other vet said she can't be sedated.
Me: I don't plan on sedating her for the x-ray. She just has to lay on her side long enough for me to click the button.
She looks at me suspiciously
Me: Or we can try Lasix to pull fluid from her chest. But I don't know for sure if there is fluid without an x-ray.
Her: I guess she needs an x-ray.
*OMG! Listen to what I'm saying! Don't bring in your seriously ill dog and throw out every random road block on why things can't be done! Especially when I already strongly hinted that your dog is suffering and you decline euthanasia. If you won't end their suffering, I WILL require diagnostics in order to treat them to the best of my abilities.*
Sadly, even after an x-ray confirming a poor prognosis, the owner insisted on trying treatment for the little dog's heart failure because She'll hate herself if she doesn't try. No, your dog (and I) will hate you for prolonging your poor pet's suffering. Can you imagine struggling for every breath, feeling like you're drowning the entire time? And you already let this go on for THREE DAYS!
In this profession, we are blessed that we have the option to end suffering when there is nothing more to be done to prolong a decent quality of life. I hate it when people refuse for selfish reasons. When you take on a pet, you have to see to THEIR needs, not your own.
Wednesday, October 14, 2015
Best Compliment Ever
Yesterday an older gentleman told the receptionist that I "was pretty cute" and he'd "poop on the floor for me, anytime."
I was speechless.
I was speechless.
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
PITA Returns
PITA brought in a litter of six small, stinky, fluffy puppies.
Me: I see ear mites in this ear.
PITA: Which ear?
Me: Right ear, but you need to treat both ears.
PITA: I know. Which other puppy did you see ear mites in?
Me: The second one, but you need to treat both ears on the entire litter and the mom.
PITA: I know, I always do. And which ear was it on that puppy?
Me: Left, but you need to treat both ears on all the puppies and their mom.
PITA: I treat my entire kennel twice a year.
Me: Ear mites only live on the dog. They don't live in the environment. If you are treating everyone like you say, you shouldn't continually be having ear mite problems.
PITA: I treat everyone just like Dr Owner told me to.
Me: Just make sure you treat every ear of this litter and the mom.
PITA: I will, I always do. But you saw mites in the second puppy and the last puppy, right?
Me (sighing): Yes
Me: I see ear mites in this ear.
PITA: Which ear?
Me: Right ear, but you need to treat both ears.
PITA: I know. Which other puppy did you see ear mites in?
Me: The second one, but you need to treat both ears on the entire litter and the mom.
PITA: I know, I always do. And which ear was it on that puppy?
Me: Left, but you need to treat both ears on all the puppies and their mom.
PITA: I treat my entire kennel twice a year.
Me: Ear mites only live on the dog. They don't live in the environment. If you are treating everyone like you say, you shouldn't continually be having ear mite problems.
PITA: I treat everyone just like Dr Owner told me to.
Me: Just make sure you treat every ear of this litter and the mom.
PITA: I will, I always do. But you saw mites in the second puppy and the last puppy, right?
Me (sighing): Yes
Monday, October 12, 2015
Dick and Balls
A (male) owner recently asked a friend of mine (another veterinarian) if he could take his dog's testicles home after the dog was neutered. Her answer was no, but the question in everyone's mind was "why does he want his dog's testicles?"
The answer: His uncle Dick's ashes are on his mantle and he and his friends think it would be funny to put his dog's testicles up there and tell everyone he has "Dick and Balls" on his mantel.
I can't make this crap up.
The answer: His uncle Dick's ashes are on his mantle and he and his friends think it would be funny to put his dog's testicles up there and tell everyone he has "Dick and Balls" on his mantel.
I can't make this crap up.
Friday, October 9, 2015
Open letter to the guy who told me I was "letting his cat die over $40"
Dear Guy who told me I was "letting his cat die over $40"
We had a really crappy conversation in the lobby because you did not believe the receptionist that I would not dispense antibiotics for a cat that I have never examined. You were a nice, clean cut looking guy, dressed in your work uniform like you were on you way home or to a late lunch. Our conversation went something like this.
Guy: I need some antibiotics for my cat.
Me: I'm sorry, but I cannot dispense antibiotics for a cat that I have not seen.
Guy: I used to work for a veterinarian. I know what I'm talking about. She just needs antibiotics because she has an upper respiratory infection.
Me: I'm sorry, but it is state law that I cannot send a prescription medication for a pet that I have not examined.
Guy: The vet I used to work for did it all the time. She gave antibiotics to anyone who needed them.
Me: It's illegal to send prescription medications for pets that have not been seen in the past year.
Guy pulls out his phone: Here's a picture of her, now you've seen her.
Me: That's not the way it works.
Guy: I don't have $40 for an exam. I just need the antibiotics.
Me: Is there anyone you can borrow $40 from for the exam?
Guy: So you're going to let my cat die over $40?
Me: You can also contact the local humane society. They sometimes have funds available to help in situations like this.
Guy: I can't believe you're letting my cat die over $40!
He stomped out and attempted to slam the lobby door behind him.
I have several problems with out conversation that I did not feel comfortable discussing with you in your agitated state.
1) I'm not letting your cat die, you are.
2) If you really "know what you're talking about" then you should know that otherwise healthy, adult cats do not die from upper respiratory infections anymore than healthy adult people die from the common cold and 2b) Just like the common cold, most upper respiratory infections in cats are viral. So the antibiotics you want so bad might do a whole lot of nothing to help your cat. - But I can't determine any of this WITHOUT AN EXAM!
3) I don't give a damn what the vet you worked for did. If she was so free with prescription drugs, call her. I happen to like having a license to practice veterinary medicine and I'm not going to risk it over something stupid, like a $20 antibiotic.
4) I have a hard time believing that you *can't* come up with $40 for an exam. You were dressed in a work uniform - so you have an income. You drove a car to the clinic (we watched you drive away in it) - so you have enough disposable income to put gas in it. I'm pretty sure that was a smart phone that you flashed your cat's picture on - so you have enough disposable income to cover a cell phone bill.
5) You don't *want* to come up for $40 for an exam because you would rather come into my clinic and use emotional blackmail to get things for FREE. Paying for an exam and actually getting veterinary care for your cat might mean that you would (gasp!) have to go without internet on your phone for a month.
Thank you for your time. Now go take care of your cat.
We had a really crappy conversation in the lobby because you did not believe the receptionist that I would not dispense antibiotics for a cat that I have never examined. You were a nice, clean cut looking guy, dressed in your work uniform like you were on you way home or to a late lunch. Our conversation went something like this.
Guy: I need some antibiotics for my cat.
Me: I'm sorry, but I cannot dispense antibiotics for a cat that I have not seen.
Guy: I used to work for a veterinarian. I know what I'm talking about. She just needs antibiotics because she has an upper respiratory infection.
Me: I'm sorry, but it is state law that I cannot send a prescription medication for a pet that I have not examined.
Guy: The vet I used to work for did it all the time. She gave antibiotics to anyone who needed them.
Me: It's illegal to send prescription medications for pets that have not been seen in the past year.
Guy pulls out his phone: Here's a picture of her, now you've seen her.
Me: That's not the way it works.
Guy: I don't have $40 for an exam. I just need the antibiotics.
Me: Is there anyone you can borrow $40 from for the exam?
Guy: So you're going to let my cat die over $40?
Me: You can also contact the local humane society. They sometimes have funds available to help in situations like this.
Guy: I can't believe you're letting my cat die over $40!
He stomped out and attempted to slam the lobby door behind him.
I have several problems with out conversation that I did not feel comfortable discussing with you in your agitated state.
1) I'm not letting your cat die, you are.
2) If you really "know what you're talking about" then you should know that otherwise healthy, adult cats do not die from upper respiratory infections anymore than healthy adult people die from the common cold and 2b) Just like the common cold, most upper respiratory infections in cats are viral. So the antibiotics you want so bad might do a whole lot of nothing to help your cat. - But I can't determine any of this WITHOUT AN EXAM!
3) I don't give a damn what the vet you worked for did. If she was so free with prescription drugs, call her. I happen to like having a license to practice veterinary medicine and I'm not going to risk it over something stupid, like a $20 antibiotic.
4) I have a hard time believing that you *can't* come up with $40 for an exam. You were dressed in a work uniform - so you have an income. You drove a car to the clinic (we watched you drive away in it) - so you have enough disposable income to put gas in it. I'm pretty sure that was a smart phone that you flashed your cat's picture on - so you have enough disposable income to cover a cell phone bill.
5) You don't *want* to come up for $40 for an exam because you would rather come into my clinic and use emotional blackmail to get things for FREE. Paying for an exam and actually getting veterinary care for your cat might mean that you would (gasp!) have to go without internet on your phone for a month.
Thank you for your time. Now go take care of your cat.
Thursday, October 8, 2015
Looked like an idiot in front of my boss
Early in my veterinary career, I pulled a bottle of Panacur dewormer from a high shelf and, without looking, shook it vigorously. Well, whoever had last opened the bottle had just set the lid on top of the bottle instead of screwing it on firmly.
So when I shook the bottle the lid and a large amount of thick white Panacur splattered over the wall and ceiling.
Of course my boss was standing just outside of splatter range, watching the whole show.
He just said, "Now you know what assuming does."
So when I shook the bottle the lid and a large amount of thick white Panacur splattered over the wall and ceiling.
Of course my boss was standing just outside of splatter range, watching the whole show.
He just said, "Now you know what assuming does."
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